La Shawn Barber pointed me over to The Smoking Gun, who has the the copy of Terrorism 101, Bin-Laden’s Terrorism Bible. Not everyone will want to read this, but the best advice I’ve heard as an agent is think like the enemy.

Think like the enemy…what are they thinking? Let me tell you, they have thought of about everything. Even what to do when they are taken to prisons and detention centers.

You know what, that really sounds familiar to me. Where did I hear about this. I know it had to do with something called Newsweek…oh yes! I remeber now, it was the Koran-flushing incident in a prison. That’s right. You have to read that part of the manual.

Also, I especially liked seeing what espionage techniques are used by the Terrorists. It begins with a history of spying by the Muslims…Muhommad had spies that worked for him. That sort of bored me so I skipped ahead to page 8.

“It is possible to gather information through newspapers, magazines [Newsweek..cough cough...], books, periodicals, official publications, and enemy broadcasts. Attention should also be given to the the opinions, comments, and jokes of commom people.”

Watch out people, the terrorists are watching you whether you know it or not. They are out there. The enemy within is there. Think about it. Watch what you say. You don’t want to betray America.

There spy methods are extremely good. But we’re better. Believe me.

And there were things on cracking codes, making codes, and hiding secret messages (which I have done many a time with this wonderful secret ink pen that I can’t find right now.)

This stuff blew my mind. How can people crack these codes? It wouldn’t be easy.

And finally, what gets me is that in every case where the Terrorist is cuaght, he is to point to the fact that he was tortured. He is to go to a medical examiner and make sure that he says he’s been tortured. And you know what, the media will love that too.

“The brother may have to confess under pressure of torture in the interrogation center. Once in the prosecution center, however, he should say he was tortured, deny his previous confessions and ask that the interrogation be repeated.”

Groan.

Well folks, think like a terrorist, and get the terrorists before they get you.